Have some mercy on yourself!

One fine evening, a tiny squeaking noise knocked on my eardrums suddenly, shrugging me out of slumber to take notice of the source of this sound. It seemed like someone is shouldering tons of weight and is just on the verge of breaking down. Just waiting for a floating feather to rest on the already mounted burden, with threshold limit crying aloud to be crossed to break the suspense of ‘When?’. Rubbing my eyes, I looked around but couldn’t find such thing within sight and before someone tries to point out, I clarify that I am not the overweight types, and couch (on which I was resting) was certainly not squealing under my weight

Still I could hear that noise demanding my immediate attention and more I concentrate on that, more shrilling it gets. Brushing under the carpet the thoughts of me getting mad, I asked my inner self ‘What is this?’ (I can see some raised eyebrows) Calmly it threw another question at me, ‘Have you peeked inside your brain?’ [Such things I don’t do normally, so please don’t term me as lunatic.] Fearful of what I may find, I sneak peeked in my cluttered brain (it reminded so much of my desk, unordered and chaotic).It was such a mess that I was bewildered to admit that it was mine and little shameful too. Neocortex or the rational part of brain was overburdened with the tons of information and was coated with a layer of ugly slime of prejudice. Limbic System or the emotional part of brain was all muddled up .It was sitting aloof in some corner besides a heap of memories and selecting which one is important to keep  and which is useless to throw away and trying to connect some long lost links. Hindbrain or the primitive part was laughing at those two and was busy in playing by itself with the dried flowers of creativity.  

One look at it and it clicked the source of all that noise, it is my tiny brain suffering under all that heavy blocks of information and pressure, asking for my help. I couldn’t help cursing myself,’ what have I done to my buddy? ‘. Probably given it the gift of being the most reliable one. Passing the pressures of all kinds, be it professional or personal, for it to deal with along with ever bothering tension. The pressure to excel, the expectation for self to get nothing but the best is killing the beloved clever buddy every day. Everything inside it is working in such a monotonous speed. Is that how I wanted it to be? No!!

I always wanted to be just happy, spreading smiles all around and send some nice happy thoughts to tickle my brain and be calm. May be a puzzle or two for exercise to keep it in shape but definitely not like a machine, not anymore. Enough is enough!