I yearn to be free

I yearn to be free..

free from being answerable

free from in-self breeding constraints

free from the glaring judging eyes and big mouths around

I yearn to be free …

free from the shackles of fear and unknown

I yearn to be free …

for I can spread my wings ..

feel air in my hair tresses

with warm of sun on my face

cool of water kissing my feet

an odd mystic gleam in my eyes

looking beyond horizon .. beyond the red dot.. beyond the half lit crescent

I yearn to be free..

for I could hear the noise of stillness around

to feel nothing of past .. no dream for future

for my heart  to go out for none but for the mystic nature

I yearn to be free..

to live in the moment .. humming away in silence.. 

Kahi mai koi aur to nhi..

Sukhi pattiyon ki khar khararat bhi ab shor lgti hai

Garmi ke bad pehli baarish bhi khidkiyan band krwa deti hai

Gili mitti ki saundh pr bhi muh fer ke laut jati hu mai

Hasi ki kilkariyon se bhi ab sehem jati hu mai

Aasun bhi ab palko me hi simat gye

Khuli aankhein sapne dekhna bhool gyi

Khili hui dhoop me bhi toofan ke aane ka darr lgta hai

Pathar pani me dalne se usme hilta hua apna pratibimb anjan lgta hai

Kahi ye toofan mere ander hi to nhi..

Kahi mai koi aur to nhi..

Kahi mai ab koi aur to nhi..

Rambling about nothing!

What you feel when you are in never-ending roller coaster ride (literally or even figuratively) grumbling, kicking or shouting and suddenly it comes to a halt ..  you just don’t feel the sudden jerk but a feeling of nothingness just engulfs you. For some moments you try to rejoice the adrenaline rush that you just felt some time back and smile to yourself. But even this thin line smile vanishes the moment you realize it’s all gone leaving its fragrance behind.

You may be wondering what has gone into my head to blurt such nonsensical sounding gibberish and my plain jane answer is Nothing, absolutely nothing! A tormenting ride through different courses , zigzagging through roads laden with good food and chitter chattering friends named MBA@ IIFT,Kolkata has come to an end taking absolutely no care of what we wanted it to be. But I cant even blame it , I had my phases where I just wanted it to end then and there at that moment or where I just wanted it to go on till eternity . Unfortunately, either of which was not possible.

Time that looks like another lifetime altogether is still remaining before I start pretending to be busy again in life.  But till that , how hard I am trying to fill it with bits and pieces , life jar still looks empty giving a mournful expression. I can just see a greyish smoke of nothingness spreading out in my tiny brain, engulfing it and choking it, making it plead to me to do something about it.( Oh yes, on knees ,joined palms and burst of tears-kind-of pleading)

Help me! (Oh my brain is all so dramatic) It cries out , refusing to even think of fun ways to salt up(if not chilly up) the few months. Or may be this rambling was its idea of trying as last little something before noose around it tightens to leave no room for further :P